Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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I Have a Black Friend

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

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A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops