Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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what happens when you wake up inception

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What is brown and smells like bacon? Bacon

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A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops