How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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Why did the Middle east send Doris a camel's penis? Because Uncle Monty's head was damn tasty

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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Jesus wept.

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ASSCHEEKS

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What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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9/11

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Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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