How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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Penis.

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A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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