A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Women's rights.

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Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Knock knock

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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