What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

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Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops