one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

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1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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call me maybe.

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How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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-"Hey! You guys wanna hear a joke" -"What?" -"Womens Rights"

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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roses are red violets are blue i like movies get me a taco

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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