what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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