Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What is brown and smells like bacon? Bacon

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

Knock knock

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

P0P T4Rt

What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

So a baby seal walks into a club.

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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