What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

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a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

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Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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The AIDS patient was gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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