I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

Your mom.

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

Penis.

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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