(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops