What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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mitchell palmer sucks

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Boob

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

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what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops