Hey, you have small hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

thumb_up thumb_down -26

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What's better than group sex? Gang rape

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

thumb_up thumb_down -116

What was wrong with the black guy? He was black

thumb_up thumb_down +89

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops