why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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what happens when you wake up inception

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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