whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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Where does a hobo live? A box.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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Diana and victoria

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops