Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

My mom touched my wiener : \

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

What's long brown and sticky? S**t

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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