Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

Hey, you have small hands.

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

My nipple is bleeding

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

Womens rights

Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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