why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

You're on fire.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...