How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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