why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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