How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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a man walks into a bar and dies

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops