why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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what do u call a black person a black person dehh

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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What do you call a black pilot? a pilot you racist bastard...

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this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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Winking at old people

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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Politics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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