Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

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bite me

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

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yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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