there once was a black man who played basketball

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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