A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

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what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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Gay rights

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Poop.

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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