where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

whats worse than gill? nothing

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

Two black guys are seen running out of a convenient store. They've just received word that two planes crashed into the twin towers, both their sons worked maintenance on the 73rd floor.

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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