What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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A van drives into a car.

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops