What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

What did the fish say to the human ? He didn't say anything fish can't speak.

Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

A man walks to a baseball game what does he see? Many people

I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

POOP.............................................. ITS THE FUNNEST WORD OF ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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