What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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