How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops