How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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whos district champs not JM

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

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Wihat's red, green, and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender!!!!!

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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