What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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