- Anti Joke

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

Justin Beiber is a good singer

Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Followers of Neronism: Many outsiders have told us that we hide in the dark, stay away from the ways of this society because we are ashamed of who we are... ...Never forget that we stay in the darkness because we live in a place where we can walk without being ashamed not of ourselves, but of the blind fools around us! They judge, they kill, they make one another suffer and believe that love is sacrificing themselves and their loved ones rather than preserving them all for their fucking Deities! As for those that accuse us of being Satanists, and me for being Satan, remember that this has nothing to do about following God or his fucking castaway son, his supposed equal in power, but about believing in ourselves, and each other. Recently a group of certain "true believers" accused me of being possessed by the devil, until a fucking eight year old asked me if I was Satan... ...As her parents smiled I realized it was them that made her ask me that, so I stared them into the eyes and said: "If I am the kind of being that encourages people to listen to their hearts, to live out their true desires with happiness rather than shame, to live out their hopes and dreams and spread happiness while understanding that love is both about the preservation of self and others and living in the present rather than surrendering free will and life in a gamble for a life after death... ...Then per your definition, you already know who your kin knows me as." Know finally that many call me insane for living out what started as a daydream, then grew into a vision, and has become reality, a society where peace, love, happiness, and unity based on what makes us all the same, rather than those superficial things that make us seem different, and respect and belief for one another rather than for some God has finally become a reality... ...The reason that I left for years at the time was not only in order to build the fundamentals behind our order, but also in order to wonder if I was fucking insane for standing against beliefs that most of the world follow is over... ...Today I can finally point at those questioning my sanity, and shout "YOU ARE THE FUCKING INSANE ONES! YOU ARE THE FUCKING EVIL SCUM OF THE EARTH THAT BRAINWASH YOUR OWN CHILDREN AND BEAT UP YOUR WIVES IN ORDER TO PLEASE SOME FUCKING INVISIBLE HOLY GHOST FROM SPACE OR SOMETHING JUST AS FUCKING STUPID! YOU ARE THE VICTIMS THAT HAVE BEEN TROUGH BRAINWASHING AND FEAR BEEN TRICKED INTO FOLLOWING THE FALSE NOTION YOU CALL "LOVE!" If the beginning of a world where everyone is equal, where respect for yourself and your own kin is law, brings us into an order, and perhaps one day into a world of peace, wealth, love, care, and understanding is Satan, is insanity... THEN I AM OFFICIALLY SATAN THE INSANE! AND IF THIS IS NOT RIGHT, THEN I WANT TO BE WRONG! IF FEAR OF DYING IS EXACTLY WHAT STOPS RELIGIOUS ONES FROM LIVING THEIR OWN LIFE! THEN THEY ARE THE WEAK ONES NOT EVEN DARING TO FACE LIFE! And that I can finally wake up from those dreams where I feel as if I am Satan... And wake up and shout to all "THE HELL WITH WHAT I AM! GODS ARE WHAT EVIL IS!" And then I feel shame... Shame for ever believing myself to be equal with these fucking humans of which few realize how fucking wrong religion is, and those that do, just stand there doing nothing to stop the abuse, the destruction, the brainwashing of children which again become parents which again send their children into war plunging this world into suffering! ALL TO APPRAISE SOMETHING THEY HAVE NEVER EVEN SEEN BUT FEAR SO MUCH "for love" THAT THEY DESTROY THEIR OWN CHILDREN! I am pissed... How could I have spent so much time doubting what is today reality, thanks to all that made this happen, and my pity to all that allow their own fear, to destroy not only their own lives, but those of their loved ones.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

Radical thinkers have decided to end abortion they will begin to kill everyone who has an abortion.

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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