how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

Dumb

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

TIMMY

Get 100,000 Twitter Followers for $49.99 at Ladsta.com today!

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...