If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

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what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

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why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

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what do you tell a black man getting hit by a police baton? that is racial inequality, and you no longer have to take that due to Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops