When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

What are blacks scared of? The kkk

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What is life? Paul.

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

You sick fiend

What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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