A man sat down Then he stood up

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He cheated at boggle.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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