I AM DISSAPOINTED

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

YOLO

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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