One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +144

Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Asian NASCAR.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Christians

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Diana and victoria

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Who's fat? Holly Davis.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops