A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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pubic lice.

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Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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3 strangers were locked in a dark room they turned the light on, unlocked the door and proceeded with their day.

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Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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What did the kid see when he fell down the well? Nothing it was to dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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