whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops