What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

My nipple is bleeding

Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

Hi my name is Bob

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

I AM DISSAPOINTED

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

YOLO

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...