Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

thumb_up thumb_down -32

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

thumb_up thumb_down -72

You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -92

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

thumb_up thumb_down +61

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

thumb_up thumb_down +55

2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops