What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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A fairly-priced Apple computer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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My nipple is bleeding

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops