roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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21

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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Where does a hobo live? A box.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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A fairly-priced Apple computer.

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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