roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

What is it called when a black guy gets robed A crime

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! In for a penny, in for a pound. I'm Donald Trump!

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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