Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

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What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

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roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

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What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

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Why was 9/11 funny? It wasnt; amny people died.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroy his family and career.

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A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

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woman's lacrosse

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why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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