How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the difference between a black man dead in the middle of the road... and a deer dead in the middle of the road? One is a human and one is an animal

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If you took all of the garbage produced in New York City in just one week, and put it in the middle of Central Park, the stench would be unbelievable.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

taking out the trash... at night

thumb_up thumb_down +2

gingers

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many people does it take to screw a light bulb? One, it's all the sex they can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops