- Anti Joke

Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

Yo mamma so stupid Her IQ is sub par

What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops