A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

Why did Rosie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus...

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

hi michael

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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