what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

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What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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Vagina Boob

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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david give me my money back... i will have it next week

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Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

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Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops