Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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why did the man get arrested? because he was a thief, and thieving is completely unacceptable in a civilised society

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

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What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

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what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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